Monday, July 20, 2009

Permanence

Driving home from the airport, I was sad. It was the final move to breaking away from my parents, knowing I'll only be around to visit, as all adults do when they get married and move away. It felt strange and almost crushing, especially since I was only coming home to a couple of cats.

But as I was driving home, I pumped up the Essential Johnny Cash albums as I drove through dense, wild and beautiful wilderness, felt the air get colder as I approached the coast and saw the fog roll in through the tall pines, and I knew I would be okay. Change is difficult, especially permanent change.

And as I sit in a quiet apartment, poorly lit but comfortable, and possibly too expansive for a single person, I feel the change moving through me. Although the marriage is nothing more than paperwork to announce a relationship that felt like marriage from the beginning, I feel more alive and adult than I ever have. But that doesn't mean I'm fearless.

1 comment:

  1. The flight home was long and difficult. Leaving my "little girl" behind was sad but necessary. You are no longer MY "little girl" but a very fine young lady. I am very proud of you and glad that you are happy. I know that you will be very successful because you are a fantastic writer and more so, a wonderful person. I will miss you tremendously but will look forward to watching you continue to grow and to visiting you guys in the great northwest! All my love.
    Dad

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